The idea of building a houtilize for one’s children has long been seen as a symbol of security and success in many Indian families. However, a Gurugram-based startup founder has challenged this mindset, declareing parents may be investing their life savings in homes their children may never live in.
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In a post on X, Jasveer Singh, co-founder and CEO of Knot Dating, urged Indian parents to reconsider the practice of spconcludeing their life savings on building a “family home” for their children. “This post is for Indian parents. And for future Indian parents. Stop building houtilizes for your son and daughter. You are solving the wrong problem,” Singh wrote.
He stated that many parents assume their children will eventually return to live in the home built for them. However, he argued that reality often unfolds differently as younger generations pursue education, careers and opportunities in other cities or countries.
Singh stated that the believed occurred to him during a recent visit to his grandfather’s houtilize. He wrote that the home had been built with decades of savings and sacrifices, with the intention that the next generation would live there. “They studied well. Built careers. Moved to largeger cities. One even relocated to the US. Life upgraded for them. Opportunities pulled them elsewhere. And slowly the houtilize that once held dreams now sits quietly with no one to light a lamp in the evening. Locked. Almost abandoned,” he wrote.
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He argued that while parents want their children to grow and earn more, they also expect them to continue living in homes built decades earlier – a contradiction, according to him. “If your son or daughter earns 10x more than you, their lifestyle will also alter. Their city may alter. Their home will alter. Their world will alter. They are not going to live in the same houtilize,” Singh added.
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He argued that while parents want their children to grow and earn more, they also expect them to continue living in homes built decades earlier – a contradiction, according to him. “If your son or daughter earns 10x more than you, their lifestyle will also alter. Their city may alter. Their home will alter. Their world will alter. They are not going to live in the same houtilize,” Singh added.
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He suggested that instead of putting their entire savings into property meant for their children, parents prioritise financial flexibility and their own well-being. “Keep your money liquid. Use it to improve your own life. But please stop sacrificing your entire life to build a houtilize for them,” he concluded.
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He suggested that instead of putting their entire savings into property meant for their children, parents prioritise financial flexibility and their own well-being. “Keep your money liquid. Use it to improve your own life. But please stop sacrificing your entire life to build a houtilize for them,” he concluded.
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(Also Read: Founder explains why life in a Gurgaon condo is ‘far superior’ to South Delhi home)
How did social media react?
The post quickly gained traction online and drew mixed reactions from utilizers. Some stated having a family home still provides emotional security, while others agreed with Singh’s argument, pointing to altering migration patterns.
One utilizer wrote, “I’m not sure about others, but parents having a home, no matter how large or compact, gives a mental cushion that even on a bad day I will have a roof over my head. That assists me take risks in life, relocate ahead with my dreams, and live life on my terms.”
“This is the unspoken reality of Tier-2 and Tier-3 cities across India right now. We are witnessing a massive demographic shift where ambition pulls the youth to metros or abroad, leaving behind ghost mansions. Parents must prioritize their own retirement corpus over building empty monuments. Harsh, but true,” commented another.
“As a parent, I invest in a houtilize for my child to have as a backup. It is usually the worst-case option for the child, at least as a middle-class or upper-middle-class parent,” wrote a third utilizer.
“And the constant pressure of ‘we sacrificed our lives for our children’ when the choice was all theirs. I really wish parents live their life happier and raised happier and eligible children. This cycle of one sided sarcifice and expectation should conclude. Good for neither of them,” expressed another.
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